Carrot Cake

To Every Carrot Cake that isn't My Mother's Recipe,

I'm deeply sorry to say this so bluntly- you aren't as good as my mother's carrot cake. It isn't that you are a bad cake, but you are just not up to my standard. Having a slice of you is actually worse for my health than a slice of chocolate cake would be- because I almost always have to go home and bake a decent carrot cake for myself, and then eat it. Personally, I don't understand why so many so-called carrot cakes don't actually have carrots in them! Orange cream cheese frosting does not a carrot cake make. So I say this without being glib, The Carrot Cake is a Lie.

Sincerely,
Kate
(an avid cake eater)